Meeting Shania

I have a name-dropping problem. Sometimes I just can’t stop. At least that’s what my friend from the Shania Twain Band tells me. Speaking of him I had a run in with Shania a couple years ago when she came to town.

My wife and I met up with my friend (did I mention he plays in Shania’s band) and we hung out back stage talking before the show. When it was time for him to go up on stage my wife and I walked out to go watch the concert but we were still back stage.

There is a thing called a “Meet and Greet” and it’s usually something for radio contest winners to meet the famous person back stage. It promotes the show. Anyhoo, I saw a line of a bunch of kids and parents with baseball hats and t-shirts and posters with Shania’s picture on it. I saw her making her way toward the line of fans. I told my wife to get ready. As she approached I cut in the line, explained who I was (did I mention I know this guy from her band?) and tell her that I would like to get a quick picture with her. She kind of snapped back, “Yes but make it quick” but in a Canadian accent. So the picture is taken and she walks to the line of people waiting. By this time the music from the show had started and I had just outsmarted a bunch of lame contest winners.

Here’s where it got lame. My wife jabs me explaining what had happened. “You just cut in front of the Make-A-Wish Foundation.” Hmm. I looked. It was true. The kids, the parents, all waiting for their one chance to meet a famous person.

I was torn. On the one hand I felt awful. I couldn’t have done anything more selfish. But was it really selfish? The picture I got with Shania, I will (marginally) treasure for many years, maybe 35 years if the ticker doesn’t give out. However, how long did these kids have, 5, maybe 10? Now who’s being selfish?

I’m a pretty terrible human being sometimes. Thanks for reading.

Does God Recycle?

I was watching Celebrity Circus last night and I saw the host Joey Fatone introduce the next act Rachel Hunter. I asked my wife why these people were famous. She said Rachel Hunter was a super model from 20 years ago and Joey Fatone who was originally from the NSYNC, my second favorite boy band (BSB 4ever!)

The premise of the show is to get people on the D list to show up, smile, and act like they’re concentration is for some purpose.

(By the way, if you’re wondering if I, myself, would ever participate in a show like this the answer is “where do I sign?”)

So yes I’d do it but I’d be constantly weighing the humiliation against the paycheck.

I digress.

Hunter and Fatone were recently on another show called dancing with the stars, arguably the same premise as the former show mentioned except it’s met with former C listers and much more popular. Also, dancing peeps are less creepy than circus folk. So at what point do you think the two made the jump from C list to D list when they were clearly at one point solid Bs?

I thought back to shopping with my mom when I was a kid. We used to go to Marshall’s. Marshall’s always had a ton of cheap stuff but where did it come from? Did fashionistas in Paris dream of designing blouses and skirts to be featured on the sales rack at Marshall’s? No. Their stuff started out at Macy’s. And when they couldn’t sell there, Macy’s sold the blouses and skirts to Kohls. From Kohls to Mervyns to J.C. Penny to Sears to Ross ending up finally at Marshall’s.

So what was God intending when he made me? I was probably going to be a minister or an executive in a large corporation making huge donations to charities and writing books about how humble I was. Then when I was little I sinned. I sinned again. Fast forward 33 years. Now I’m on the Y list writing blogs to losers.